Jumping Into The Unknown

By Samantha Mora – March 2025

How Leveraging Fear Can Drive Change

I remember it like it was yesterday. “Don’t look down; just focus on what’s right in front of you and take one step at a time,” Steve, our ropes course facilitator, said calmly.

Yeah, easy for you to say, Steve, I thought. I was 50 feet off the ground, clinging to a tree with tiny steps. Although I was held up by a harness meant to keep me safe, I still wondered why on earth I agreed to participate in this leadership retreat.

I thought this retreat was supposed to be about team building, not testing our comforts with heights. Turns out, it had a lot more to do with leadership than I could have ever expected. So there I was, about halfway up the tree, paralyzed with fear and wanting to quit, give up, and start making my way back down. I thought to myself, “what’s the difference if I make it to the top or not?”

Feeling defeated, and ready to give up, I paused and cried out, “I can’t, I can’t.” That’s when Steve, ever composed, casually replied, “Can’t or won’t?”

Suddenly, fear took a backseat, and my almost bruised ego stepped in, telling me that we can’t let people think we are weak. I wanted to shout, “Shut up, Steve,” but instead, I found motivation in that age-old saying “oh, I’ll show him.” So I took another step, and then another. This time, I was one final step away from the top, where I had to stand on a space so narrow it felt like the diameter of a quarter—but really, just wide enough to fit two feet.

When Fear Reveals the Truth

Below me, my team cheered me on, and my husband shouted, “You can do this!” That’s when it hit me—the pressure of not letting them down instantly paralyzed me yet again. I was at my edge. The point where you’ve faked it for as long as you can, where the mask of “keeping it together” and “I got this” finally slips out of your grasp. There was nothing left but me and the truth I had been avoiding: words I was too embarrassed to admit and feelings I have continuously ran away from.

I’m not sure if it was the adrenaline, the difference in the air, or Steve’s ability to ask just the right questions to get to the root of things, but I felt strangely safe enough to shout what I was really feeling. Though it feels silly now, at that moment, it was a confession I had never fully admitted to myself. “I’m scared!” I shouted! Looking back, I realize this was the moment Steve was waiting for to bring out the heavy artillery. He said “look at me” and then asked …

“How many times have you let fear stop you from crossing the finish line?”

When Fear Becomes an Ally

That question really hit home. Fear and I have a long history, always subtly guiding my decisions. For the longest time, I told myself I had to mask any hint of fear, never realizing what it was costing me by playing it safe and choosing the path of least resistance rather than daring to take risks and believe in myself.

As I stood there, faced with that piercing question, I began listing all the times I let fear keep me from crossing the finish line: the dance major I changed because I feared rejection; the Broadway dreams I shelved because I feared I wasn’t enough; the business idea I abandoned because I feared it would fail; the marathon I never attempted because I feared I wouldn’t make it to the finish line, so why even try? Each memory a reminder of how fear had held me back.

In that moment, heart pounding, standing at the crossroads of fear and growth, I found myself facing a choice. I could have easily said “forget it” and walked back down, retreating to comfort and safety as I have done many times before —I was good at it! Or I could be the woman who took risks despite the fear and who believed in herself as passionately as her team cheering from below. So, I took that final step. And there atop the 50-foot tree, I stood taller than I ever had before; I was more than just standing, I was choosing to rise above every doubt that ever tried to hold me back, transforming not just my view, but my very self.

When Fear Teaches Lessons

After that big ordeal, jumping from the top to make my way back down seemed like a walk in the park. After all, I was attached to a harness—a reminder that even when we take leaps, we are never without support. That day on the ropes course was almost 14 years ago, yet I carry its lessons with me every single day. It didn’t just change me, it redefined how I see myself as a woman, a teammate, and a leader.

Lessons from Confronting Fear and Moving Forward With It:

Stepping into the unknown may feel uncertain and uncomfortable, but it’s also where we discover our strength and resilience
Challenges don’t just test us, they offer the opportunity to shape who we become
Uncertainty can be a wall or a doorway, an obstacle or an invitation to grow
And above all, be honest with yourself —or find yourself a Steve, I think we know a few of them here at Stop At Nothing\

When Fear is Leveraged for Impact and Change

Fear shows up differently for all of us. Maybe for you, it’s not a 50-foot tree, but the fear of speaking up when it’s easier to stay silent—whether that’s advocating for yourself, your team, or a cause you believe in. Maybe it’s the fear of taking a risk on a new opportunity instead of staying in the comfort of what’s familiar. Or perhaps it’s the fear of pushing for change when it’s easier to maintain status quo.

So, I leave you with the same challenge Steve gave me that day, questions to help you navigate your own defining moments. These aren’t just inquiries; they’re invitations to examine the fears that may be shaping your choices in ways you haven’t fully realized.

Five Key Questions to Recognize Fear as a Signal and Lead Beyond It

How does fear show up in my decisions and interactions?

Fear isn’t always obvious. It can look like hesitation, procrastination, over-explaining, staying busy, or avoiding a decision. How might this be shaping the way I show up—and how others respond to me?

What is this fear trying to protect me from—and what is it costing?

Fear often signals something deeper—like the need for control, fear of failure, or fear of rejection. Is it keeping me (or those around me) from taking necessary risks, making bold decisions, or embracing new opportunities?

How is this fear influencing the way I lead and collaborate?
- Is it guiding my choices toward safety instead of growth? Is it slowing down decision-making, blocking innovation, or discouraging open dialogue?
If fear wasn’t leading, what kind of leader would I be?
- Fear can exist without dictating the course. How would my leadership, decision-making, or personal choices change if I trusted myself and those around me more? What actions would I take if fear wasn’t the deciding factor?
Who can support me in moving through this fear?
- Fear thrives in isolation. Who can you lean on for perspective, accountability, or courage? How might sharing your fear with trusted individuals not only help alleviate it but also strengthen your relationships?